Being genuine is a true treat that everyone should nourish. We are continuously bombarded by external influences. How many times do you see yourself doing something just to stick to someone else’s vision of you. Yes, I know that you wanted just to be polite and to see the other happy about you.
But I have a powerful question for you: Do you feel whole or sometimes you feel like an empty shell?
It is amazing the number of roles that we play each day. Our life itself is a giant theatrical stage. All of us, actors, portraying some other persons’ vision of ourselves. Come on, it might be just your parents’ vision, it might be your spouse’s vision, it might be your boss’s vision, it might be your peers’ vision and so on and so forth.
Most of the time we are just going through the motion, not stopping to think about what is happening, to think about what we are feeling.
When we play someone else’s vision of ourselves, we are using that person’s perception of the World, their values, and with the perception about what they think is OUR identity.
Sounds odd doesn’t it? Even worse, feels odd !
Allow me to invite you to have a break. Find a quiet spot where you allow yourself to just BE. Take some deep breaths and verbalize your intention – Who am I?
Write down in a piece of paper the first words that raise on your thoughts. That might be very close to your identity, to who you are.
Without much thought on the process, take another couple deep breaths and verbalize another intention – What is important to me?
Again, write it down. Those are probably your values.
With this information in hand, you may face each role you play and ask – is this role aligned with my identity and with my values?
Isn’t this amazing? Suddenly you may realize that some of those roles go totally against your values and your identity.
Having that comprehension is paramount to start YOUR transformation and, the beauty is, it just depends on YOU !
What about the others? What they might think?
Most of us are people pleasers.
We, all, have fears. Since childhood we are coached to please others, and since teenagehood, we fight to fit in our peer-group.
While fitting in, we totally forgot who we are. Instead of living as a Star, we are satellites in everyone else’s lives.
When you live by your values, true to your identity, you will attract people – the people that, truly, understands you. The people that resonate with your vibe. In the process, there’s a probability that you will lose people. But those that truly matter, those that truly loves you, those will prevail.
I do not believe in all that mambo-jambo “everyone should be happy all the time”. Sometimes being authentic implies that you may be sad about something, or that you may say “NO” when a friend asks you something or you may not like someone’s attitude… I think my point of view made its way through.
Remember: to be truly authentic, embrace your identity and honor your values.